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Quotes - Alcohol
See also Quotes - Drinkers & Drinking
| "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." | Dave Barry |
| "Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder." | Anon |
| "Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working" | Harold Rudolph |
| "Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, it is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." | Jack Handey |
| "Real ale fans are just like train-spotters, only drunk" | Christopher Howse |
| "Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, it makes you lean .. against bars, tables, chairs and poles" | Anon |
| "Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer." | Dave Barry |
| "He was a wise man who invented beer" | Plato |
| "Beer is the reason I get out of bed every afternoon" | Anon |
| "You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer." | Frank Zappa |
| "You don't have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps." | Unknown |
| "Whisky is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold." | Jerry Vale |
| "What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for." | Irish Proverb |
| "Irish Coffee is the perfect breakfast because it contains all four adult food groups: fat, sugar, caffeine and alcohol." | Anon |
| "Wine is bottled poetry" | Robert Louis Stevenson |
| "Wine is sunlight, held together by water." | Galileo |
| "Wine gives courage and makes men more apt for passion." | Ovid`` |
| "Why is there so much wine left at the end of my money?" | Milan Maximovich |
| "Be careful to trust a person who does not like wine" | Karl Marx |
| "If drinking is evil, then why did Jesus turn water into wine?" | Anon |
| "A meal without wine is like a day without sunshine, except that on a day without sunshine you can still get drunk." | Lee Entrekin |
| "This is one of the disadvantages of wine; it makes a man mistake words for thoughts" | Samuel Johnson |
| "A hangover is the wrath of grapes." | Unknown |
| "And God said, 'Let there be vodka!'
And He saw that it was good. Then God said, 'Let there be light!; And then he said, 'Whoa - too much light.'" Unknown |
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